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Tuesday, October 26, 2010

The Definition of Halloween

Finally, it is here, the sexy Wookiee costume. Because if there’s one thing that has passed through the mind of every young man who has seen any movie in the original Star Wars trilogy, it’s “I wish somebody would combine Wookiees, and the attractiveness of sexy young women.” Really, there’s nothing that goes together more naturally than giant, hairy aliens that scream a lot, and healthy human attraction.

Luckily our prayers have been answered! This year’s hot new costume is the Sexy Wookiee, also known as ‘You made my mind imagine things that I can’t unsee’.

Also available at the same site is the Sexy Stormtrooper, because of course we all had hidden fantasies about those guys when they were doing sexy things like getting shot and bumping their heads on doors, and all were just waiting to see what they would look like as attractive women. Well, now we don’t have to wait any longer.

(You might argue that well, Leia dressed up as a Stormtrooper once, so it’s not that weird to make a skimpy female costume out of it. Well, Leia also dressed up in a gold bikini. What the hell is wrong with just wearing that?)

But the crème de la crème is the Sexy Darth Vader costume, because everyone who saw Star Wars was also fantasizing about running their fingers over that blue, veiny skin… okay, we’ll stop.

The point is the one expressed on this T-shirt, that for many young women, Halloween is just an excuse to get anything in the universe and make a slutty costume out of it. And sometimes, it goes too far.

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